Wednesday, December 28, 2011
where to start?
Keeping it real, here, people Advent was more or less OK. Christmas Eve was nice. Christmas morning Mass was lovely. And then it all hit the proverbial fan. Something was said. Feelings were hurt (mine). More things were said. Voices were raised. Doors were slammed. All in all, it was not a pretty scene. For the birthday celebration of the Prince of Peace.
I am so not a door-slamming kind of person. I let things go. I overlook a lot. But it just blew. I felt justified. I know that the other party is not totally at fault, but I also know that there is a lot of validity to what I am feeling, thinking. I still haven't sorted through it all...still haven't figured out how to make it better. This is where it is handy to have someone to bounce ideas off of - someone who is not going to automatically take either side, but give you an objective picture. But that is hard to find.
I thought briefly about going to confession this morning before Mass, but I wasn't sure exactly what I'd confess or if I was actually sorry or just wanting to complain. So I figured I'd wait...
But there were some good moments, too. I like this picture of my dad and granddad. My granddad turned 95 in April, and his health has not been the best in recent months. But he was with us for Christmas - alert and "with it". It brings back bitter-sweet memories of an elderly neighbor of my parents who was like a grandparent to us. About three or four years ago, she was with us for Christmas - as good as ever - and then gone two weeks later.
And this picture of my brother and sister watching their little ones play.
Dear Hubby's grandkids are visiting. There are six - ranging in age from nearly 3 to just turned 12. The oldest always spends most of his time with us when they visit. He likes hanging out with "the uncles" who are nearly 15 and 16. They enjoy him in limited quantities. He thinks he is on vacation...but there is still boring stuff to be done - like raking leaves.
With a house that is big enough to hold a few more, we have also had some of the others spending the nights and days. One night I had the 5, 6, and 12 year olds. The 5 year old was walking around the house at 3 am crying. Last night was the 6 and 9 year olds. They are good kids as kids go, but taking care of other people's kids during my Christmas break... Is it wrong to feel that way?
I am so thankful that my 16 year old has wrestling practice at 7 a.m. That means we have to leave the house before they wake up. I go to Mass and work-out or run errands waiting for him to finish. A little bit of peace.
Does anyone have cheese to go with my whine?