Thursday, June 17, 2010

shhhhh.....

Does anyone else crave quiet? Or is it just introverts?   I seem to have an  unquenchable thirst for quiet.  Not necessarily quiet time for prayer, but just quiet in general.  The need seems to have grown with age for me.

My dear husband does not share this need.  When he is home, the TV is on.  Only in recent years does he sleep with the TV off.  When he is awake, he seems to need to talk [over the TV].  Often I start off in the same room as him, but between the TV and the talking, I can only take so much.  I find it nearly impossible to have a complete thought.  One night I was in the bedroom (where it is quiet) saying my evening prayers.  He came in to go to bed, and asked if I minded if he did so.  "No," I said, "just don't talk, let me finish with my prayers."  He could not help himself.  He HAD to talk.  I finally got up and finished my prayers in the bathroom that night.

The need for quiet is something that has come up repeatedly in conversations with my priest - in the confessional and outside.  I sense that he is a kindred spirit in that respect.  Our first conversation on this topic centered around the Rosary.  I had gone early to Mass at another parish for the very reason of having some quiet time with the Lord.  But when I got there, the Rosary was in full swing.  Nothing against the Rosary, but I didn't want to pray the Rosary that day.  So I waited until the end.  Then there were another 39 prayers tacked on to the end of the Rosary.  It was like the first Alien movie.  You thought it was almost over, but then BAM!  another twist.  So much for my quiet time with the Lord.  But I was left feeling guilty that I had such ill feelings toward the Rosary.  So I asked in confession - sin or no sin?  No sin, he said.  And furthermore - he says -  that's why you won't find the Rosary before any of our Masses except Wednesdays.  Another time my penance was to "go enjoy the silence before Mass and let Jesus speak to you."  How awesome is that?

Today, when I brought up the difficulty of finding quiet, he told me to get in my car and drive to a quiet place.  I do try to do that with the chapel, but it is not nearly often enough. I feel guilty for leaving.  He suggested a nearby monastery, and that is something I am going to have to try on for size.  Unfortunately, if I left every time I felt the need for quiet, I'm afraid I would never be home.

People, in general, though don't seem to "get" quiet.

1 comment:

  1. I'm with you on the quiet--that need for background noise mystifies me.

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