creating a space

Often in the mornings, I stick around after Mass.  There is really no point in going back home (and leaving again in 5 minutes), and I don't want to be too early for work.  So I soak in 15 or 20 or 25 minutes of quiet time and life is good.  The priest finishes up what he needs to do to get ready for the next Mass, and then he turns off the lights - except for the one where I hang out - locks the doors, and leaves me in peace.

Sometimes I drift over the alcove where the Blessed Mother's statue is.  We talk about mom things or husbands.  There are candles in her alcove, and it bothers me when there are some that are burnt out, so I will take those out and replace them with fresh ones and then all seems right in the world.  Occasionally, I come across one which has started to burn and then fizzled.  I will indulge my inner pyro and relight it...sometimes it takes a little bit of persistence, but I usually get it.  Prayers go along with those burning candles, so I figure maybe those prayers needed to be stretched out for a while longer and I'll add my prayers for whatever intention they were lit for.

A couple of weeks back, though, I came upon a candle that was a challenge.  It was filled to the very top with wax, and the wick didn't have a chance.  It reminded me of us sometimes.  We are so filled with all kinds of useful and good things - husbands, children, work, church activities - that we don't have a chance.  The candle had every thing it needed in order to be a fully-functioning candle (wax and a wick), it was just too full.  During this season of Advent - or what remains of it - give yourself some space, preferably a quiet space and see if that doesn't help your light shine more brightly in the darkness.

Related side note:  One of our church people had a stroke last year about this time and now lives in a nursing home nearby, but is still pretty functional.  At Bible study a few weeks ago, he had asked me if I'd give him a ride to the church gumbo which was last Sunday after the 10:30 Mass.  I'd agreed.  I called him on Saturday to see what time he wanted to be picked up (I'm thinking 10:30...11:00.)  "Well I want to go to 8:30 Mass," he said, "so you can pick me up at 7:30." I must have stuttered a little bit, and I'd already left a voicemail  suggesting 10:30 or 11, but I agreed to 7:30.  He called me back a few hours later and left a voicemail saying 11:00 would be fine, and after having had some time to think about it, I called him back and told him I would be there at 7:30.

He was waiting with his walker outside the facility the next morning when I got there (in the vicinity of 7:30).  He showed me how it folded up, I threw it in the back, and we were off.  There was only one other person in the church when we got there, and the air conditioning must have been set on "morgue", but in an otherwise non-stop, crazy weekend, it was wonderful to have that quiet space before Mass started, and I appreciated that God had arranged for me to have it.

advent and other random thoughts

Or alternately titled "seven not-so-quick takes"

1.  The wonderful liturgical season of Advent.  Possibly my favorite.  It stands in contrast to the fever pitch that the rest of society reaches at this time of the year.  It has been a good one, so far, for me.  I have done a little bit of my Christmas shopping already.  (this is a first!)  Taking advantage of some of the early sales and not creating more pressure for myself at the last minute.  One thing I have tried to do is to read one of the readings from the daily Office of Readings from the Liturgy of the Hours.  (There's a free app for that.)  There are two readings each day after the Psalms.  One is from scripture and the other is usually a homily or some writing from a saint or someone significant in the early church.  Today's was kind of "out there", but some are really good.  There is such a wealth of unread treasure in our church.

2.  Speaking of church...Thursday was the Feast of the Immaculate Conception.  A holy day.  I took my boys with me to 6:30 Mass.  It wasn't really a huge sacrifice...we left the house a little later than we usually do when they catch the bus.  We did the same for All Saint's Day and they made it to school before the tardy bell rang.  I guess the new translation runs a little longer, because this time we didn't make it.  They were 8 or so minutes late.  Not to worry....religious observance is an excused absence.  So I went in with them to check them in.  I said something to this effect to the Assistant Principal who was standing there (I used to work with her long ago).  She had some comment like "good try".  Kind of uncalled for, I thought, and they marked the kids as "unexcused".  They both called my attention to it, and I just told them I would research it further.

I found a copy of the student handbook when I got to school, and sure enough...  So I emailed someone in the office of Census and Attendance for clarification.  He told me to email him my children's names and he would take care of it..

3.   I can check their grades and attendance record on line.  The greatest thing ever.  There's a free app for that, too.

4.  I had an observation on Monday(by my principal).  He's a pretty laid-back kind of guy, so I wasn't really too stressed.  I had him come when I have fifth grade.  Oh my!  I had two that claimed they had headaches and they didn't do anything.  My student with autism was in full autistic mode.  Another one took his shoes off and then decided in the middle of my math lesson that his desk needed to be 409'd.  It was a circus.  But it is over.  As he left,my principal said, "Well, THAT was interesting."  Oh well.  Laugh.  Cry.  It is what it is and it's why I cling dearly to the brink of sanity.  He did say that I "handled it well." 

5.  Our parish has an annual Christmas concert called "Lessons and Carols".  Scripture readings alternating with Christmas songs.  I go every year...usually the guys stay  home and watch football.  I have been toying with the idea of becoming a lector at Mass.  It's been a thought for a long time - even before I was asked to be a Eucharistic Minister.  Some of the people who read...oh my...I try to be charitable, but sometimes I just want to scream, "It's 'expiate" not 'expedite"!     But I am reluctant to volunteer...you know...what if I suck at it?  So earlier in the week, I had the idea of reading for Lessons and Carols.  It could be a kind of trial run.  But then I figured that readers had already been selected.  Today on FB, our parish's music director was lamenting the fact that he had picked the "wrong" weekend.  Our local university football team is playing in a bowl game in New Orleans and the Saints play on Sunday, and some of the readers wouldn't be back in time.  So I offered to read.  :-)  Cool how God arranges things sometimes. 

6.  My kids are going to New Orleans this weekend with a friend (one of their wrapping buddies)  to watch the football team from their school play for the State Championship.  The house where they are staying is right by the French Quarter.  They were excited.

7; I prayed for my car the other night.  (I got the idea from one of our Bible Studies.)  The 4-wheel-drive on my vehicle seems to be going out.  Sometimes it gets stuck in 4WD, but always the next time I start it, it is back to normal.  Last week, one day, it was stuck in 4WD all day.   So after I dropped off my young 'en at the football game, I stopped in at the church just for a minute.  "Lord, if you wouldn't mind, I would appreciate it if you could get the stupid thing out of 4 wheel drive."  I went back out, got in the car and guess what???  It was out of 4WD!  I love how God is there in even the little details of our lives.

mental health day

It's been quite a while since I've had a real "mental health day".  But today was such a day.  My youngest had a haircut appointment at 3:00, and this year the only way I can swing hair appointments is to take off of work.  Last time I just took half a day.  Today, I figured it was a good excuse to skip the whole darn day.

I got dressed and made my lunch just like I was going to work.  Is that dishonest?  It was MY mental health day and I wanted to do what I wanted to do.  Alone.  Us introverts recharge by being alone. 

I took the kids to the bus stop as I do every morning.  At 6:10, it is still dark (except for a couple of weeks after the time change).  A few mornings we have gotten there and the bus was waiting.   Not sure if it was waiting or if we just arrived at the same time.  Today from a street over, we saw flashing lights where the bus stop is.  Our buses are pretty flashy in the darkness.  But alas, it was a fire truck. Just stopped in the street.  I waited a minute and then crossed in front of it (trying to get out of the way)  It blew its horn at me!  Sheesh.

I started off my morning with Mass.  There is no better way.  This little church is not too far from my house, and I try to hit daily Mass there once a week...usually on Tuesdays, when my parish doesn't have Mass.  I like this picture that shows the light coming from within this gloomy morning.

After that, I passed by my school.  I had to drop off some lemons and check on paperwork that I had only half-way filled out.  Have I mentioned that we have lemons?

Lots and lots of lemons.  We have "squeezed and freezed" at least 30 cups of lemon juice.  Probably more.

After a brief visit at school (I am NOT here...you never saw me...) I went to the nearby church.  It is open during the day and a wonderful spot for me to spend some time with Jesus.  This is my before-school stop and usually I just visit with Him in the tabernacle, but on Tuesdays they have Adoration.  I spent a good while there - probably close to an hour.  It was nice to be able to take my time and not rush.

I took the pictures "on the down-low", using my zoom and without a flash.  I didn't want to disturb the other "adorers".  It occurred to me that Jesus first had to endure the cross before he could be present to us under the appearance of bread in the monstrance.  One such an ugly reality, and the other so beautiful.  Our lives parallel that in some ways.  We endure...in hopes of that eternal beauty.

After this, I moved on to walk for 30 minutes on the treadmill.  Normally, I don't work out on Tuesdays, but I'd left my water bottle there yesterday, and figured that "something was better than nothing" in the world of work-outs.  I really don't enjoy working out all that much, but I do feel better when I do.  I come in, do my time and leave.

It was a dismal fall day.  Misty off-and-on rain.  Gray skies.  Cold.  Wind.

I went across town to deposit a check and to do a little shopping.  I bought 4 advent candles.  Yeah, I know I'm a little late, but I have not been able to find them this year.  I may be the only one in my family who has missed them.

For the first time, I have a house that is decorate-able, so I looked at Christmas decor.  Oh my!  It costs some $$ to look good.  I guess I'll have to work up to decorating very slowly.  Or just appreciate other people's decorating that much more!

All in all it was quite peaceful and enjoyable.

I picked up my younger after school to take him for his hair-cut.  For some reason, his brother rode the bus home.  While I was sitting at the hair place, my phone rang.  He was home, but had lost his key and it was cold.  I told him to jump the fence into the back yard and the dog would probably keep him from freezing to death.  His brother had a complicated solution that involved going through the attic and assumed that a door would be unlocked.

So being a problem solver and a critical thinker, he came up with this.  Step on the chair.  To the top of the government trash can (that just happened to be in the backyard, because they cleaned last weekend).  To the top of the kitty litter bucket (we had filled it with acorns).  A jump to grab hold of the railing.  Pull yourself up.  Step over the railing and into the unlocked balcony door.

He demonstrated.  Ah...to be young and strong again.  Upper body strength and all of that.  Oh well.  Sometimes I'd just settle for being able to walk and cough at the same time.  But I digress....

All in all, a pretty decent day.  I think it went much better than the observation I had yesterday.  I'll have to cover that in another post.

lost in translation?

I confess, I am a liturgical geek.  So here are my musings, as such...

Thursday, at Thanksgiving Mass, I knew that would be the last time I would hear that particular translation of the Mass.  No big fanfare.

Friday morning, we replaced the missalettes at our parish, as we do every so often, usually coinciding with a change in liturgical seasons.  But this time was special.  This time, there were pew cards, too!  The Ladies' Altar Society was in charge of changing the missalettes (and I showed up, along with a Boy Scout and his family because none of the ladies can lift the full boxes once the old missalettes are packed up).  But our pastor had charged our sacristan with putting the pew cards in the pews.  He guarded that duty with great care!  After the ladies had all left, he and I chatted for a bit.  I offered to help him with the cards - he suffers with arthritis and various other ailments - but he declined.  I was stepping into my car, about to leave him to his task, when he reconsidered, "Would you mind helping me?"  Not at all. 

I was ready for Mass on Saturday evening a full hour ahead of time.  I wanted to be there for the unveiling of this new translation, for sure!  History in the making!  You could feel the excitement!

The "pew cards" contain a condensed version of the new translation of the Mass, so that you are not stuck flipping through the missalette.  This is the first real change in about 40 years.  "Translation Sunday", our cantor called it.  I thought he had the best line of the evening when he was reviewing some of the musical changes with us..."The words to the Great Amen have not changed...it's still 'amen.'"  Well, thank goodness for small favors, I suppose.

It was a little overwhelming with both new music and the new translation.  Even though Father reminded everyone before he began Mass that "and also with you" would now be "and with your spirit," 20 seconds later, when he said "Peace be with you," the replies were about 50/50  "and also with you/ and with your spirit."  It is just so automatic for most of us. By the end of the Mass, you were thinking about every word before you spoke it...."Amen is still amen?  The Our Father...it didn't change, did it?  Lord hear our prayer?...still good?"  This morning, at the end of Mass, Father said to "Go in Peace," and some people questioningly mumbled, "Thanks be to God." 

Our good monsignor, who has really down-played the whole new translation thing, said that he hadn't been this nervous for his first Mass.  But all, in all, it went pretty well for a first time, and it will get better each week.   I put a shout-out on my facebook page to all my Catholic friends and family "on leave" from the church.  Come back now, and you will be as lost as everyone else!  Really, a limited-time opportunity.

I like the new sound of the prayers.  Like a well seasoned dish, rather than a plain piece of bread.  They have made it even more beautiful!

Because I am a liturgical geek, I noticed a couple of months ago, that our pastor had tweaked ever so slightly the part of Mass where he said "This is the Lamb of God...."  He began to end it with the same ending as the new translation.  Last night, I realized why...the server clears the Missal from the altar during the Sign of Peace, so our priest says that part from memory.  All he needed to do last night was to add the beginning.

I noticed another something and that was as he prepared the altar for the Eucharistic Prayer.  From atop the chalice (?) he took a cloth (the corporal?) and unfolded it, spreading it on the altar before beginning his prayer.  Not sure if that was a universal change, or just an option he decided to exercise.

 And...last but not least our altar servers had new albs after a gazillion years of the old ones!! 

Happy New Year to my Catholic friends!  May your Advent find you waiting at the door of your heart...ready to open with the Lord knocks!

getting ready

It has been a great Advent!  I went into it with few expectations other than a resolution to be more faithful to prayer.  With God's grace, that has gone quite well!

I did take a day at the beginning of December to go on a Day of Recollection, and that was wonderful!  I came away from that time of reflection with a couple of things - God wants me to be patient and God wants me to look for Him in the paperwork and the meetings - in the things of ordinary life.  The very next Sunday, one of the readings was about patience, and it seems like that topic has come up time and again in my daily prayers from the Liturgy of the Hours.

I went to confession, and made sure that my boys had the opportunity to go.  My penance - once I dumped the darkness in my life - was to reflect on and give thanks to God for the way His Light is able to shine in my life.   I took one of my boys the other night when Father set aside an extra hour to hear confessions, and he said that he got to suggest his own penance.  I've gotten some variation of that a time or two.  My teenager's take on it was "Hey, it's YOUR job to come up with the penance." 

Shopping has not been over the top this year.  I feel a little bad that I don't think their will be too many (any?) surprises for my boys under the tree.  But there will be things.  Things that they want.  We drew names with dear hubby's family, and that cut the gift list nearly in half.  With my family, we decided to buy for our Godchildren.  I ended up with an "adopted" Godchild to ensure that no kid would be left without a gift, but it's all good.  I bought him a few small items, but also included a necklace with a medal of his patron saint, and had it blessed this morning.

I had wanted to do a post about the O Antiphons.  Maybe tomorrow?  Christmas Eve - yeah, right.  Maybe next year?

Last year, my sons and some other Boy Scouts were in need of service hours for their rank advancement.  The good Monsignor graciously allowed them to help with decorating the church for Christmas.  I think all he really wanted them for was to carry the Nativity figures from the hall to the church, but we ended up staying a couple of hours.  The boys were somewhat helpful with other things, and the other mom and I enjoyed helping, too.  When we offered to help this year again, there was no hesitation.

The boys got stuff from the attic and closet, hung wreathes, carried figures and flowers, and generally helped out.  Father likes to have a hand in things, so he was there calling the shots.  The lady who has been doing the decorating for several years is "retiring", and asked the other mom and I if we would like to "take over".  I am now one-half of the decorating "committee".  So ironic, because decorating is so NOT one of my gifts.   

Older child hanging a wreath.  

The Nativity Scene.  This was the work of the good Monsignor.

Notice the candles on either side.  

That ties in with the candles on either side of the altar and the candles on either side of the tabernacle.  

The Light of the World.

Decoration on the choir loft.  It looks uneven/weird because the sun is shining through.

Wreathes under the Stations of the Cross.  We "fluffed and hung".

The Sanctuary.  The altar is bare, but Father said he'd take care of that later.  

We down-sized our tree and decorated today.  Now there are signs at my house that Christmas is coming. 
Christmas Eve will be my official "wrapping day". 

Ready or not - here He comes!  Are we more ready to receive Him into our lives than we were four weeks ago?  He is with us always.  God-with-us.  Do we find Him (or even look for Him) in the drudgery of meetings and paperwork and ordinary life?

From today's homily:  Does Jesus really make a difference in our lives?  Are we willing to let Him draw us closer?  (If not, then we are celebrating a pagan solstice - not Christmas.)    The bottom line borrowed from John - "I must decrease so that He can increase." 

home stretch

Here we are in the fourth week of Advent.  Someone pointed out how fortunate we are to actually get the full four weeks of Advent this year!

We got out for the Christmas Break (yes, it is still called CHRISTMAS holidays here) on Friday.  Sixteen glorious school-free days stretched ahead.  But they are flying by.  They really are the shortest days of the year!

 A couple of pictures from last Saturday:

 

Our little group of Boy Scouts celebrated Christmas with a bonfire and gumbo.  It's become an annual tradition.  The weather was great for it this year - not too cold, but cool enough that the warmth of the fire was appreciated.  The company was good, and the food - as always - was delicious.  

One thing that we don't want to become an annual tradition is what happened on Monday.  The owners of the property where the fire was held had checked the fire on Sunday, wet it down, etc.  They were a little surprised to get a call on Monday saying that their pasture was on fire!  Took six fire trucks to put it out!  But only grass was burned, so that was fortunate.  Those trees to the right in the top picture - weed trees (Chinese Tallow; they call them "Chicken Trees" here) - anyway, the property owner wanted them to burn.  Naturally, the fire went around them!  They are still standing.

Went to daily Mass Monday morning.  It was so nice to get there early since I didn't have to worry about waking anyone up and getting them out the door and on a bus.  Time to enjoy the silent presence of God.  

As we left church, one of the Sisters commented about how beautiful this tree was:  

I'm glad she noticed it.  And I just happened to have my camera with me...so I snapped a picture!  

Our priest heard confessions Monday night - first time he's ever added extra time to the confession schedule, so that was a nice treat!  I had one child who hadn't been in a few months, so we dropped by.  Other child and I had gone a couple of weeks ago.  I thought about going again - if for nothing else than the example thing - but it just wasn't calling my name.  I was glad to see that there were a handful of other sinners there.  Hopefully, our dear priest felt it was worth his while and will do it again.  Thirty minutes on Saturday afternoon and 3 mornings a week from 6:15 - 6:25 just isn't very much to pick from!

I have put together 2 photo books in the past week.  They came out nice (I hope), but I'm pretty certain that the one I finished today won't be here in time for Christmas Eve.  I have an idea of something simple I can put together so SIL will have something to open.  I also made a photo calendar for my parents.  Time consuming, but I'm always pleased with the results.  

This has been the least stressful before-Christmas period that I can ever remember.  I still have stuff to buy, and I have wrapped nothing, but it is still do-able, and I naturally wait until the last minute.  No tree has been put up yet.  We have down-sized our gift list (which has probably greatly contributed to lower stress) and I think we are going to down-size the tree, as well.  Bah-humbug? 

Stayed up late last night (partly for the eclipse).  Got up early for Mass.  Took a nap this afternoon.  Which will cause me to stay up late again.  Isn't vacation great?

Thursday, we (me and the boys) are helping with decorations at church.  We did that last year, as service for Boy Scouts, and it was fun!  Looking forward to it this year.  The boys had a great time climbing around in the attic at church, and they must not have stressed our pastor too much, because he readily accepted our offer to help this year.

Chances are I'll be blogging again between now and Christmas.  But if not - a very, Merry Christmas to you and yours.  O Come, O Come Emmanuel.  God-is-with-us!

doing advent

I generally appreciate the liturgical seasons of Advent and Lent.  There seems to be a grace - I've noticed it often during Lent - that allows me to do things that don't seem possible at other times of the year. 

This is the first year I've noticed that during Advent.  For years past, we've had an Advent wreath on the table and lit it at some points during Advent - reading a reflection along with it.  My boys tolerated it, I think, so they could blow out the candles at the end.  Cheap thrill.  This year, one night when I was afraid the power was going to go out due to the weather, I stuck some tired, used candles in the wreath.  And that is what has remained.  It is has been largely ignored. 

I did though, have some plans for Advent, and I wrote them down at the beginning, in "The Little Blue Book".  One plan was a return to a more structured prayer life, especially after realizing that my personal prayer life was being put way at the back of the line or not at all. That is going well. It is really not that big of a deal to put prayer BEFORE computer time.  Reconciliation was next on the list.  Check.  Still have one of my offspring to arrange this sacrament for.  He has decided that confessing to our parish priest is a little too personal.  "He knows us too good, Mom."

Looking at ways to simplify gift giving has been another one.  Going well.  Sister and I simplified for the children and eliminated the adults exchanging gifts.  I suggested donating to a charity, and she was alright with that.  Hubby and I sent some financial assistance to a lady we know who struggles.  She was very appreciative. 

One thing at the bottom of the list  - working on attitudes - remains a work in progress (or maybe it's not even in progress).  

I was introduced to "The Advent Conspiracy" on another blog.  Look for them on YouTube, if it strikes a chord.  Their ideas are to "Give Presence". Worship Fully.  Spend Less.  Give More.  Love All. 

The theme of Mass today was Wisdom.  From the Opening Prayer (that prayer no one listens to, says our bishop):  ...May we live as he has taught, ready to welcome him with burning love and faith...  That's what wisdom is, says our wise pastor.    At the end of the Gospel, we see that "...Wisdom is vindicated by her works."

Throughout Advent the theme has been repeated that there are things God has done, things God is doing, and things that God will do in the future - if we let Him.  There are things that happen "in the beauty of the struggle". 

From today's Evening Prayer from Psalm 116.... I called on the Lord's name...I was helpless so he saved me..... It just sounds so matter of fact.  Like, would he do any other thing.  I call.  I'm helpless.  He saves.  End of story.   I turned the page and saw this gem from Psalm 121....My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.  That was my mantra last year.

From today's Blue Book:  If the Messiah was to bring freedom, and the Messiah has come, I should experience this freedom.  Here.  Now.  And I can.  It is the freedom of realizing that I don't have to be God.  I don't have to be the Messiah.... All I have to do is my best, and pray and know God loves me.  I can let God be God....and rejoice. 

Hope you are all having a Blessed Advent!

a little silence

Sister-in-law and I had signed up for a women's "day of recollection" in early November.  I had seen it in a church bulletin (it's a sickness - picking up a bulletin of whatever parish you visit), and we had sent in our $$ in plenty of time.   But we got back letters saying that we were being placed on the waiting list. 

Tuesday was the long-anticipated day, and since we had both gotten subs for the day, we decided to go anyway.  If they let us stay, fine.  If not, then we would have our own day of recollection somewhere.  They warned us that we might have to sit on the floor, but they let us stay.

There were two presenters, and there were a lot of messages woven into the day.  Femininity, waiting, loving, listening, quiet, utter active receptivity (try that one on for size!), slowing down, surrender, and more.  Wonderful advent messages.

But the best part for me - maybe for all of us - was the silence.  After we listened to the first presentation, we were told to meet back at 11:30 in the cafeteria for lunch.  There would be silence until then.

So SIL and I walked outside.  

It was a little cold, but we found spots in the sun.  

I stretched out on a bench.  

She walked on further and found a chair.

Very peaceful. 

 

I found that it wasn't a time so much to talk to God, as a time to listen.

It was confirmation for me that I'm not the crazy one for craving silence in my daily life.

That, in fact, we NEED it. 

 

I had forgotten my journal, so I had to improvise.  I still found a place to write.

And I reached into my bag and found some things to meditate upon.  

Things that seemed to be just what I needed to hear.

God has a plan for my life.  I knew that already.

And that plan includes paperwork and meetings.  

Why?

Only God knows.

And he wants me to be patient.

He is there.  In the craziness.  In the mind-numbing paperwork.  In the endless meetings.

We were behind an old, historic church.

There seemed to be cemeteries on all sides.

A reminder of  the promise of something better.

And then there was school today.

The stupid IEP program wouldn't work when I had time to use it.

And so it begins.

The chances to practice patience and looking for God in the paperwork.

One of my co-workers so neatly summed it up...

Re-entry's a b!tch, isn't it?

Yeah, but worth it!

While I was there, I signed up for a 3-day silent retreat in September.  Can't wait!

happy new year!

My friend says she makes Thanksgiving resolutions, since she doesn't keep the New Year's variety.  What she probably doesn't realize, (and what I didn't think of while we were talking), is that a New Year starts this evening - a new liturgical year in the Catholic Church.

This year starts with us waiting in "patient hope and joyful anticipation" for the coming of Jesus - God is with us - Emmanuel.  Patient hope and joyful anticipation, my pastor says, like the people camped outside of Best Buy on Thursday evening - waiting for the doors to open on Friday!

Jesus is already with us.  We know that.  He is with us in His Word, in the sacraments of the Church - especially the Eucharist.  He is with us in the people around us, with us in prayer.  So it's not as if we are waiting for him to be "more" with us.  We already have it all, so to speak.

Perhaps, it is about us being more open to His presence with us.  Maybe that is why the purple vestments have reappeared again, after endless days of them during Lent.  While the rest of the world is busy seeing how many Christmas trees can be put up and how many presents can be waiting under the tree on Christmas morning, we are called to slow down and reflect, to look within -  and see how we might be more open to His presence in our lives.

I think the final question of the homily was, "How bad do you really want to be with Jesus?"  And my immediate mental answer was, "more than anything."  But I didn't really have to reflect that long to see that my answer and the reality in my life are two different things.  I want to be with Jesus....as long as I don't have to take too much time away from the things I want to do to pray.  I want to be with Jesus.... as long as He doesn't ask anything too hard.  I want to be with Jesus...as long as He fits into my schedule.  I want to be with Jesus as long as I don't have to .....

So it seems like it would be a great time to start over with some Thanksgiving/Advent resolutions.  The Advent wreath (which Father blessed and lit tonight) works perfectly into the scheme of things.  A little more light each week.

Come, Lord Jesus, bring light into my life to illuminate the dark corners.  Let me be more open to Your presence in my life.

christmas blues

Don't get me wrong, I like Christmas, though I probably like Advent more - the preparing and anticipating and waiting, the quiet expectation.  Christmas brings family togetherness, food.  The smiles on my kids' faces when they get something they really wanted.  All good things.   I just wish there was less emphasis on the gifts and more emphasis on THE gift.  

Last year, money was tight in the extended family, and the gifts were scaled back some.  There was less expectation.  This year, I feel like I let down some of the recipients.  Our gifts did not match up dollar for dollar.  And when the gift-giving is basically exchanging gift cards, it's easy to see who spent what.  On the other hand, I did not go in debt up to my eyeballs.

God is good!  Maybe someday there will be more focus on THE GIFT and less on the gifts!

ready or not...

Here He comes!

This Advent has been relatively stress free.  My shopping was done yesterday - 2 days ahead of schedule by my standards.  I still need to wrap, but there is tomorrow for that, and some of it is done already. 

The tree was put up a couple of days ago.  Or half of it, anyway.  We decided to leave off the back side of it, in order to make it a little more compact.  Space is at a premium.  No ornaments this year, thanks to the cat.  But it looks nice with some twinkly lights and candy canes.  And an angel on the top that was handmade by the mother of one of my students 15 years ago or so.  Its head is a little droopy - maybe I should try to fix that.

Went to confession a week or so ago, so our souls are relatively clean; the house not so much.

Lessons and Carols was Sunday night at church.  We listened to readings recapping our salvation history and listened to/sang carols between readings.  Our choir did a wonderful job, and it was an hour well-spent.

Christmas cards got skipped this year, and I have a feeling I am not the only one.  I think I have only received 3, in spite of the fact that I actually sent them out last year!

Baking cookies was a thought.  Even bought the dough (slacker, I know).  But the kids decided (and I agree) that eating the dough is more satisfying than the cookies, soooo....the baking didn't quite happen this year.

The church is decorated.  I don't do much decorating at home, so this satisfied my decorating urge.  We were there because the boys needed service hours for their next rank in scouts.  I had been told that we would be needed to unpack some boxes, carry in the nativity pieces, and hang some stuff.  I really thought it would be 20 or 30 minutes, but we were there for 2 1/2 hours!  The boys did unpack boxes and carry pieces from the hall to the church.  We hung thingies on the walls.  They climbed around in the church attic looking for spray-painted pine cones.  We fluffed bows.  They hauled live plants and fake trees here and there.  I will try to take some pictures after Mass tomorrow and post them.  Our beautiful little church was all set for Christmas when we left!


Come Lord Jesus!

the weekend in review

Just didn't seem like too much to write about this weekend.  Not sure why I'm writing about it now...

Friday night found me at an Ornament Exchange Party hosted by one of my mom-friends.  It was a crowd of a lot of teachers from several different schools.  The food was delicious, the company was good, the evening was fun, and everyone left with an ornament.  The only drawback was my attempt to park on the street.  In the dark, I did not see the storm drain / catch basin on the curb.  I hit it with my tire, and when I got out of the car I could hear a gentle  Sssssssss.  So not a good thing.  One of the other partiers volunteered that she had roadside assistance on her phone plan and offered to call.  She did, and within a half hour or so, a young man came and changed my tire.  Unfortunately Saturday morning found me at the tire store buying a new one.

Let's see:  cookies for the party, $8.99.....2 cute snowmen ornaments, $3.99 each and 20% off, 1 new tire, $113.00 + change... Wait - something's supposed to be priceless...

What was priceless was kid #1.  His school hosted a dance the same evening.  Previously he has not been very enthused about school dances, having attended only one in 6th grade, which he declared to be a tremendous waste of his time!  But he has discovered something this year:  G-I-R-L-S!  and he was really looking forward to the dance.  I was glad to find when I picked him up that he had a good time.  Even though some of the girls weren't really excited about dancing with him, no one refused him.  He came to me with his shirt and said, "Mom, smell.  You can smell the 'girl smell!'"  That was probably priceless.  But I am so not ready for this girl thing.

Saturday afternoon was confession and Mass.  There was an actual LINE at confession.  I almost forgot what I had to say by the time I got in there - had to look at my list!  But it was good to see some other sinners. We celebrated after Mass with Chick-Fil-A.  And while the boys filled up on chicken nuggets, I had a peppermint chocolate chip shake to go along with my meal.  You only live once, and it was worth it!

Someone's cell phone went off during the quietest part of Mass - apparently not for the first time. That was awkward.  Father refused to continue Mass until the offending phone was removed from the church.  I didn't know whether to pray for him or the cell phone owner.  Maybe both. 

Sunday passed in a whirl.  The Saints are 13-0!!  I wrapped some Christmas presents.  Lesson plans.  Math homework.  Laundry.  Cleaning the kitchen. Lighting the Advent wreath.

And now I guess you know why there was nothing very exciting to blog.

first comes advent

Sometimes I feel like the lone ranger among friends and acquaintances. We celebrate Advent. Before Christmas.

I dislike that Christmas comes earlier and earlier every year. That what should be a time of waiting and preparation for the King of Kings to come to us in a deeper way, is often a frantic time of spending too much money, fretting over the getting the perfect gift, and trying to get everything "done" before the 25th day of December arrives.

What we are waiting for and preparing for somehow gets very lost in the hustle and bustle of making sure no person is forgotten, or worse yet, disappointed.

By the same token, with the early arrival of Christmas in November, by the time the actual celebration gets here, we are so saturated in the sights and the sounds that we are ready for it to be over with for another year. The Christmas season goes on until January 12 in the church. But in the secular world, almost everything is said and done by the evening of December 25. When I was a child, it made me sad to see trees already out "on the street" on the way home from my grandparents' house on Christmas night. When was the last time you heard Christmas music on December 26?

I only have one Christmas tree, and it is not up yet. It will probably go up the weekend before Christmas. To be fair, this is not SOLELY because I want to give Advent its due first. This was the way my family did it years ago, and the way it evolved with hubby and I in our earlier years. We would wait until the live trees were "marked down" before getting one! Then there is the lack of space in my cozy household. And my cat thinks that climbing in the tree and knocking down the ornaments is some kind of kitty-Olympic sport. Those reasons are also part of the reason that the nativity set is not set up, either.

The activities highlighted in the video below are some of the ways that we will celebrate Advent. For several years, we have lit an advent wreath and had some kind of reading to go along with it. Not every night, but some nights. Hubby is never a willing participant, but the boys have played along - if for nothing more than a chance to light and blow out candles. And we will "prepare our hearts for Christmas" by going to confession at some point. Trying to fix up some of the things in our lives, so that Jesus feels welcome there when He comes. And with the rolls of cookie dough in the freezer section, there might even be some cookie baking this year.

Part of me still wishes, though, for a return to a simpler Christmas where we are focused on what we were REALLY given on that first Christmas many years ago. That was THE perfect Gift!

advent video

Quite honestly, the music isn't really my style, and I'm not wild about it.  But I DO like the activities of preparation that the video shows  Your mileage may vary. 

(Plus I want to see if I can get a video to show up on my blog ;-))





Woo Hoo! It worked!