13 for 13

I was going to compose something profound about the year in review, but this seemed like a better option.  Especially since its been a while since I've written anything bordering on profound.  Thirteen pictures...from 2013.

1. My boys at a wrestling meet.  It is such a hard sport to appropriately photograph in action.  I love that they enjoy it as brothers.  They say wrestling teaches a lot about real life.  It became a little too real, however, when one of their coaches had a heart attack and died during practice in early 2013.

2.  The Eagle Project for Son #1 was completed.  Merit badges remained, but at least this part was done.

3. In the spring, I made a decision that I never thought I would make, and elected to leave the place where I had worked for the past 24 years.  In retrospect, it was an unexpected blessing.

4.  This was the key to my sanity while working at that place.  Almost every morning, before work, I could find 10 or 15 minutes or more...sometimes an hour.... to sit in the peace and the Presence.  It was at Mass in this church that I first had an inkling that God might have something different planned for me for the coming year.

5.  It wasn't the school where I thought I might be going.  But I prayed to know the "right" one, and in the end, it met every one of the specifications (both serious and not so serious) that I had on my Perfect School list.

6.  Kid #2 got to spend 2 weeks at the National Boy Scout Jamboree.  He is a character.

 7.  Kid #1 turned 18.  I was so excited that he would be able to sign all of his own back-to-school paperwork when school started.  He also worked 2 jobs this summer:  a 7:30-4:30 internship with the computer repair folks at the school board and then a 5:00-11:00 or so job at Sonic as a carhop. We didn't see much of him!

8 &9.  Totally enjoyed a visit from the grandkids.  There are 6 of them...4 of them are seen in these pictures.

10.  We don't always get back-to-school pictures. Its a hectic morning for all of us.  But they let me snap one out of the car window as they waited for the bus.  I have a junior and a senior!  How time has flown.  Speaking of time...it's about 6 a.m. in the picture, which is why they don't look too alert.

 11.  This was a long road - working on the Ad Altare Dei religious award.  But we finally finished it up and our pastor presented our little group with their medals one Sunday morning.  The lighting in the picture is not great, but we were proud.

12.  Son #2...full of the Gifts of the Holy Spirit.  Smelling the sweet scent of chrism.

13.  A half-way decent family picture at Son #1's Eagle Ceremony.  Finally!!

Lagniappe:  Visiting with my Granddad.  He is 97 and looking good!

Gotta include one more bonus pic.  This one was a "selfie in the sacristy".  Altar servers before the Easter Vigil Mass.  I like the little guy looking up to the older servers.  My guys have served at the Easter Vigil for the past 7 or so years.  They do it willingly, but each year I think, "this might be the last time.".  That growing up thing.

It was a year.  Closed doors and new beginnings.  Goals achieved, gifts received.  Through it all, God is good!

blessed fall break

First of all...I think the lack of laptop is causing the fall off in my blogging.  I've had stuff all week to post, but the best vehicle is my laptop.  If I hook it up to the monitor in the computer room when no one is occupying the desktop computer, I am almost c.o.n.s.t.a.n.t.l.y interrupted by my loving family.

For the first time ever, my school system had an entire week off for Fall Break!!  And to say that we surely needed it after the circus that the first nine weeks has been, is an understatement.

My family and I took advantage of the pleasant fall weather and rented a cabin at a State Park not far from our home. 

  This was the view from our cabin, which featured a screen porch overlooking the water.

We rented a canoe one day, and one of my children humored me and we paddled around on the Inner Canoe Trail.

We saw small alligators, bunches of turtles and random birds.

In  the evening, the grill masters bar-b-q'd.

A crane flew over to check it out...

We finished off the evening with s'mores and child #2 rearranging the furniture to have a good view of the television for the Presidential debate.

Dear hubby, bless his heart, had never made s'mores before, but had seen a recipe on TV.  He had bought semi-sweet chocolate earlier in the day, which he melted in a pan and spread on the marshmallow-graham cracker combos.

It was tres bien!

We spent two nights in the swamp and then made our way home where we had time to catch up on things that seem to get left in the dust during school...Eagle Project, blogging, haircuts, attending school board meetings,  Boy Scout things.  It has been a lovely week.  Trust me when I say that the time has flown!

Happy Fall Break!

rediscovery

If you've paid any attention at all over the last months, you have seen that my marriage has had its share of challenges.  Do I think we're headed for divorce court?  No, we're too stubborn for all of that.  Do we argue and scream all the time?  No, that's too much drama.  Could things be a lot better?  Yeah.

We have been to a few counseling sessions.  Since June, I think we've managed three.  With dear hub's job, one never knows when he will be home.  So we make an appointment, only to cancel it because he is gone, or he hasn't gone anywhere, but might, and we can't afford to turn down any jobs, because things are slow.  In the interest of full disclosure, I've cancelled a few, too.   A few months ago, I saw a blurb in the church bulletin for a program called Retrouvaille.  It wasn't totally foreign to me.  My parents had separated many years back, and they had attended this 20 or so years ago.  It seemed to have helped.  They advertise the program as "a lifeline for marriages".

It is a weekend program, followed by six 4-hour follow-up sessions (or twelve 2-hour sessions, I guess).  Hubby agreed to the weekend!, but not the follow-ups. They let us sign up anyway.

This past weekend, was our weekend.  It was held at a retreat center about 45 minutes from home.  We had to be there Friday night around 7:30.  It was rainy and overcast, but as we turned off the main road to the road that would take us to the location, there was a rainbow in the sky!  I took that as a good sign.  Our accommodations were not five-star, but comfortable.  No TV in the room.

They kicked things off that evening at 8:00 pm.  As I looked around, there were about 20 other couples.  I was struck by how young many were.  One wife was pregnant.  At least one couple was separated.  Another wife, who I chatted with during breaks said she'd filed a restraining order last week.  I'm sure there were all kinds of issues.

The weekend was full, but the time seemed to fly.  We explored feelings and we dialogued with our spouse.  There was no group sharing.  There would be a presentation led by a priest and three couples who had been down the same road we were now traveling, and then a question to write about and share with our spouse.  Saturday started with Mass, and things continued until 10:00 p.m. or later.  Sunday, was also a full day - ending with Mass around 5 pm.  Even though, it is Catholic in origin, and there is a priest on the team, people of all faiths (or none at all) are welcome.

It was a weekend of discovery for me.  I discovered things about myself and how I have affected the relationship.  What a bummer to find out that it's not all the other person's fault!  ;-)  I also cannot fail to mention how much I appreciate my husband's willingness to come and attempt the program.  We have not spent that much time together without distractions in about 100 years.

And the rediscovery - what "retrouvaille" actually means - is a process, I think, for each couple.  As we left, the presenters told us that couples leave on one of two roads:  the Road to Damascus or the Road to Emmaus. Those on the Road to Damascus are hit by a sudden realization of what they need to do (like Paul - when he was knocked to the ground...) and just need to get to it.  Those on the Road to Emmaus are like the two disciples that walked along the road after the crucifixion, disappointed and dejected that all that they had hoped for did not seem to be working out.  However, Jesus was walking along with them.

We are on the Road to Emmaus, I think.  There were a lot of ups and downs.  We have - so far - been faithful to our "homework" and are both interested in making it better.  I am pretty sure that dear hubby will come with me to the follow-up this Saturday unless he is working.  I contacted one of the couples after the weekend with a couple of questions, and they were encouraging, but mentioned that it is often 1 step forward and a couple back for a while.  So, if you're a praying person, please keep us (and the other couples) in your prayers.  And if you think your marriage could use a lifeline...consider Retrouvaille.

blogging from the ipad

Something I have never done - at least not successfully.

My laptop, which I use for blogging, went dark one day last week. The brains still work, but the display - not so much. And hooking it to another display, makes it more of a desktop than laptop.

Have never had any success in adding images to a post using an iPad, and that still holds true. Even trying to use a URL from dropbox, the blogger software sends my image to someplace I have never located.

It has been a long week, but is ending on a good note. Had a great day yesterday visiting parents, grandfather, sister, and Godchild. My sister works at a library bookstore, and I visited and came away with some easy-reader findsnfor my classroom library and some possible spiritual reading for my library. I am most excited by one that I have been looking for -- The Little Prince! I read it in HS, and have been wanting to reread to see if I can catch some of the deeper meanings.

I am sending off the deposit and paperwork for Retrouvaille weekend. Very excited about this. When I saw it in the church bulletin last weekend, I had *that* feeling. Dear hubby agreed readily enough to the weekend, but balked at the follow-up sessions, which ticked me off. However, the local folks said that - while not ideal - I could attend the follow-up sessions alone, and that perhaps after the weekend, he would be more willing. So we are going with that for now.

Quite disappointed by the Supreme Court decision on the healthcare mess. I say pray. And hubs says we need to change the nation. I say prayer is how that happens, and you start with yourself, and go from there.

One of our air conditioning units was out for about a week. It has been replaced (thank you, home warranty), so we are glad about that. It has been hot, and when it is so hot, one feels like doing nothing.

But, alas, the laundry and the dishes, and whatever else await. So I will send this off to cyber blogdom and see what it looks like when it reappears on the other side...

catching up....

Kind of a stream of consciousness...

Lots going on at this time of year.  For the first time ever, I have not been totally stressed at the end of the year.  I don't know why.  There's still a lot of stuff to get done.  Maybe I DID have some of it done ahead of time this year.  I "checked out" today with my special ed supervisor, so that is pretty much done.

We have five days left.  FIVE!  It's been an OK year.  I love my 8th graders, and I will miss them.  If they move on.  None of them passed both parts of the required test to move on.  They will go to Summer Remediation, and hopefully get the required numbers on a retake.  And then possibly an alternative 8th grade next year.  They have worked so hard this year; I was so disappointed for them.  But the test doesn't measure hard work.  Actually, I'm not sure what it does measure.  ....but let me not diverge with a rant on the educational system...

I will have a student teacher intern next semester.  That's a first for me.  Should be interesting.

Things with me and my dear hubby... Being married is the hardest thing I have ever tried to do.  We need counseling and the search continues.  He doesn't want anyone with a "religious bias", so I will probably make an appointment with my EAP.  When we talk, we just totally see things from different points of view.  He complains that I can't see his point.  He claims he can see mine, but he doesn't.  And when I try to pin down what his issues are (with me) it is like a giant game of "whack-a-mole".  Just when I think I understand what he is talking about, then, no...that's not quite it.  Things are fairly calm...the house is not a battle ground, but things could be so much better.

My good priest's mother is still in the hospital.  It is wearing on him.  You can tell he is tired.  He says they are taking it hour by hour.  One night waiting for "the phone to ring."  Other days, she looks a little better.  We had Bible Study on Wednesday night - it was the second-to-last of our study on Acts.  But he called it a wrap with that session.  Too much on his plate.  He thanked everyone for their prayers and told of the healing in his family that had taken place within the last week.  He says that when we pray for someone, not only do we pray for their needs and petitions, but we also pray FOR them - in their place - when they are too tired or not able to pray as they should.   When we pray for other people, they are the subject and the object of our prayers, he said.   

Boy Scout fundraiser this weekend, and then the last week of school!  HOORAY!

fragments

A couple of weeks ago, Divine Mercy Sunday, I think, we read the Gospel account of Thomas basically saying to Jesus, "Prove it!"  And Jesus did.  He took the fragments that Thomas gave Him - the fears, the doubts - accepted them, blessed them, and then gave them back to Thomas - as His Presence.  That is what happens at every Mass.  God accepts the imperfect things we offer Him - the bread, the wine, our issues, our doubts and fears.  He blesses them, makes them holy, and then gives them back to us as His Presence.

That image of fragments has stuck with me.  I look at the fragments that make up my life.  There is school at this time of the year.  Not enough days to get all of the work done that is there.  I have thoughts of taking off a day, so that I can go to school and work.  That's messed up!  Already, I bring things home.  Mindless paperwork that matters to no one but the higher ups.

Family is another "fragment".  The kids are involved with Boy Scouts, and that requires my time at this time of the year.  One is in the beginning stages of his Eagle project, and all three of us are selling tickets every weekend for their fundraiser.

At times I am concerned about where my kids are headed spiritually.  At times, going to Mass seems to be something to be resented.   But in the last couple of weeks, both of them - at separate times - have expressed an interest in being part of our parish's next Bible study. 

Fragments to offer to the Lord, so He can perfect them in His perfect way.

In the world of anxiety, things have been better.  Once I noticed that something was a little "off", but then he told me that he had taken the wrong pill.  But then the doctor called one day last week.  The anti-depressant can't be taken with the anti-inflammatory medicine that he takes for his arthritis.  As a matter of fact, no anti-depressant can be taken with it.

This was not exactly good news for me.  I have enjoyed  not hearing the crunching of egg shells when I walk.  Not having to figure out the rules of a game that makes perfect sense to him, but none to me. 

My thought is that the anti-inflammatory needs to be changed to something that is compatible with anti-depressants.  But I'm not sure that will happen.  He doesn't see the problem. 

Another fragment that I have to offer to the Lord.

On a different tack, our school system is celebrating the rest of spring break with a 4-day weekend right now.  We usually have a week off for Easter, but this year Easter was inconveniently located right before our statewide testing.  So we had three days off for Easter, and two days now.

I am taking full advantage of the break.  I made it a double-sacrament day this morning.  A great way to start the day!  And then home for coffee on the patio before heading out to an overdue mammogram, an overdue haircut, and a meeting concerning #1 son's Eagle project.  Home for a little house-cleaning. 

This evening my oldest is hosting a g-i-r-l visitor.  She is someone we know from years ago, and they appear to be having a good time "socializing".  My, how time has flown!  Another fragment....

[Flower pictures from my yard.  I planted the Easter Lilies, but I've enjoyed seeing the ones that others planted bloom in turn.] 

picture dump and assorted rambling

Spring is definitely here.  I'm not sure winter ever was. 

Things have been interesting in my household, to say the least.  I'm not sure that my other half recognizes there is a problem, but the rest of us do.  He has an appointment on Monday with his pain management doctor, and I am planning to go with him.  Hopefully, there will be a willingness on his part to be helped and the ability of the doctor to help. 

Tonight I was outside pulling weeds for a bit...there were enough mosquitoes to carry me away...and it occurred to me that the very thing that helps me get through whatever my days might hold....the thing that gives me peace and strength...is the what seems to be the biggest concern (threat) to my husband.   That I go to Mass every day, if I can, and that I spend time in a church before school, and that I enjoy prayer, fellowship with others, learning....it bothers him.  Sometimes, it feels like the evil one works through him.  Is that horrible to say?  But those minutes with the Lord, the wisdom from the readings and the homily, the things I have learned at Bible Study or talking to friends after Mass in the parking lot...they help me get through the day.

I have tried at length to get a picture of a bee.  We have lots of them when the trees are blooming.  But they really ARE busy little creatures, and not very photogenic.  But then I saw this one this evening.  Unfortunately for him, it looks like he died doing what he did best.  May he rest in peace. 

Last weekend was a busy one.  We helped this little guy ...my Godchild and nephew... celebrate his 4th birthday.  I took exactly two pictures (thank you batteries) and the other one was blurry.  I enjoyed visiting with my siblings for a few hours...the weather was absolutely gorgeous. 

After a while, we wrapped things up and headed to my sister's parish for confession.  I have a good relationship with my confessor, and stick with him unless absolutely necessary, but my boys who are altar servers in our small parish feel like he knows them "too well".  So we went where they were anonymous.  People in churches are strange...and this one, more so than most.  I sat down in a pew to do some spiritual reading and wait for them, and ended up changing places three times in the 10 or 15 minutes I waited!  Weird! 

We visited with my parents, then with my grandfather who will be 96 in a month!  While we were there, passing time, my 15 year old ran across a set of 1949 encyclopedias.  I think he was truly fascinated.  My aunt and uncle from New Jersey were in town, so we visited a bit with them, too.  Back to my parents' for a quick Hamburger Helper supper and then to our final destination of the day. 

The planetarium  (located on the banks of the Mississippi River) had a Pink Floyd Dark Side of the Moon show, and my boys thought would be neat.  I had hoped that my husband would come, too, but he decided to go to the birthday party in his own vehicle and then headed back home afterwards.  He is limited in what he can do with his arthritis, and this had looked like something we could all enjoy.  Nonetheless, my teens and I went, and enjoyed.  It was a little like watching high quality screensavers with music in the background. 

Can I change subjects?  That brown stuff??  Oak pollen.  Yuk!  We got a blower and that's the pile that I blew together. 

And this from last week....It's oak pollen on the swimming pool cover.  Just icky.  We survived (and fished out) the 10 million acorns in the pool and every leaf in the tree in the pool, but for the pollen, we had to quickly fashion some kind of cover. 

My youngest is running track this year.  He ended up running the 2-mile...more by default than anything else, I think.  There wasn't much competition for that spot on the team.  In this meet last week, he finished "not last"...an improvement! 

I took this picture while I was sitting in the stadium watching the track meet.  It was the day after the blow-up at home.  I think it is a reminder that God does have everything under control, and that even when things seem not good...He is with us. 

another week

Yep...nearly another week has passed!

Last year during Lent, I had so much to say that I felt like I was boring people by posting it all.  And this year...  Well, we appear to be about on the once-a-week plan!  And still I worry that I am boring people. Life has been very busy and somewhat aggravating. 

Monday?  Tuesday?  Too long ago to remember!

Wednesday, during my 7th grade math class, I heard sirens.  When class was over, I checked the parking lot.  There were not 1, not 2, not even 3 or 4...but FIVE police cars.  Parents behaving badly.  And we wonder why the kids act like they do?  Not really...it's not rocket science.  Perhaps it was the full moon...

Wednesday night my boys and I fashioned this stunning pool cover.  We survived a winter of leaves and acorns in the pool, but the infernal oak pollen will surely turn it into a icky yellowish tea.  You haven't really lived until you've fought oak pollen!

As we were putting the "cover" on it, we wondered aloud how the dog might react to it...she enjoys taking a dip in the pool in all sorts of weather.  She promptly answered our question by walking on it and nearly drowning in the process.  She hasn't walked on it since.This morning we pulled it off and tried to put it on a little better.  Hubby was home to help this time.  He belongs to the "if-duct-tape-can't-fix-it...then-it's-broke" club.  So yeah...he duct-taped it down in places... Cajun ingenuity?

And then there was one small part that the big tarp didn't cover - due to the pool's irregular shape.  So we tried to attach another one, but the holes didn't line up.  That's OK - string it together and duct tape it!  And the best part - this man is so creative - He wanted to keep this part out of the water so the tape might stick...so he got some empty containers that float, and put them underneath.  I knew we would do a better job with his help.  He is creative like that!

Wednesday was not great, but Thursday was just nuts.  My car made "that" sound when I started it in the morning.  There was nothing to do, but to go on.  Hubby was on a job, away from home, and there was no other vehicle at home for me to use.  I dropped the kids at the bus stop and went to Mass...where else are you going to go at 6:15 in the morning?.  I prayed the whole time that it would start again when I came out.  It did - barely.  So I drove to the auto parts store.  They didn't open for another 30 minutes, but I had no choice. 

I figured I'd buy a battery, they'd put it in for me, and I would be on my merry way.  Oh no, couldn't be that simple.  They tested the battery, and the result showed the battery was still good.  The man said it might be the starter??  Didn't really sound right to me, but he gave me a jump, and I went to get hubby's vehicle, which was parked at his brother's house. 

When I called my dear husband to update him on the situation, he said he couldn't talk right then, because HIS truck was breaking down.  Sigh.  Had to have his work truck towed back home from 30 or so miles away.

Meanwhile, we had left the dog in the house that morning, not wanting her to drown in our "pool cover". 

I had a 9:00 meeting that I hadn't finished the paperwork for, and my supervisor shows up at 8:30. 

It was just too much.  I was able to find a sub on the second phone call, and left at noon.  I was reminded at one point of the quote attributed to St. Teresa of Avila..."Lord, if this is how you treat your friends, its no wonder you have so few of them!"

We enjoyed a track meet that evening in gorgeous weather and had Chick-Fil-A for dinner, so the day ended pretty well.

One of my friends pointed out on Facebook that if we view trials and tribulations as gifts from the Father, then I had certainly had a very blessed couple of days!

Fast forward a day, a different battery test said it was the battery, and we are trying to decide whether it is even worth it to fix hubby's truck.  He has the sense that he will not be approved for his medical card in the coming months and is freely tossing the word "retirement" around. 

We spent a few hours outside today, trying to get the back "yard" cleaned up.  It looks a lot better, though there are still plenty of weeds to pull.  The citrus trees are on their second bloom.  We will have 10 zillion lemons...again.  The grapefruit tree has a lot of flowers, but it also seems to be "aborting" a lot of the baby grapefruits. 

These flowers are getting ready to bloom...

Lent it going well enough, I suppose.  No dramatic changes or revelations (although I have realized that I can focus much better on the Stations of the Cross if I close my eyes and listen rather than reading along in the booklet.  A nice quiet steady progress overall - at least here and there.  Compassionate Shepherd.  Bread of Life.  Giver of Hope. 

And finally - my favorite picture of the week....

Looking forward to losing an hour of sleep this weekend, anyone??  Have a good one!

here we are

At the very edge of the beginning of Lent! 

But first of all, I have to share a little bit of Mardi Gras with you...

It's kind of a recent invention...the Mardi Gras tree.  This one was at school in the cafeteria.  I'm kind of neutral on the whole thing.  I guess it's a way to get the maximum use from a Christmas tree.

And then there's the King Cake - a much older tradition.  There is a place in town - a donut shop - that sells THE best King Cakes ever.  But price is an object this year...some serious financial deficits working their way through our household, but Mardi Gras is not Mardi Gras without a King Cake. 

So, we made our own.  We took some of those highly nutritious canned cinnamon rolls out of the refrigerator.  Stretched them out, braided them (my boys learned how to braid), and arranged them in a circle.  Then dear hubby decided that he wanted filling in the king cake.  So....I made some microwave lemon curd (because one thing we have in abundance is fresh lemons!) and he set about adding filling.  The kids took the icing out of the packets and added food coloring so that we had green, gold, and purple - Mardi Gras colors.  All in all, it wasn't the best tasting cake ever, but we all had a good time making it. My teens enjoyed it...saying it might become a family tradition!  You moms who have teen boys...you know that is like the ultimate complement.

Other Lent prep.....let's see, I  think I ate every piece of chocolate in my desk at school before I left on Friday.  I almost always give up chocolate for Lent.  I wasn't sure I was going to this year, because Lent seems like it should be  more than that...but I still may.  I can offer it for my 5th graders.

I went to confession on Saturday...figured I'd beat the Lent crowd.  ;-)  My fifth graders have been giving me the blues, and that is mostly what I went with.  They are so, so needy, and I am so, so spent.  My penance tied in nicely with the homily, and I assume if there were any other sinners, they got the same thing, but, as often happens, it was a perfect fit....spend some time in prayer asking God to show you how He wants you to be compassionate shepherd, bread of life, and giver of hope.  That IS what we are called to be to others, but so often we fall short. 

I spent a wonderful peaceful hour or so at the adoration chapel last night having this conversation.  There were some new insights and ideas.  One is that I don't provide any of this...God does.  Through me.  And for that to have any chance of success, I've got to stay close to the source. 

The giver of hope, I think, is where I struggle the most.  I look at them, and realistically, I don't see a lot of hope.  I didn't come up with a whole lot of answers there.  Hopefully, God will see fit to reveal a few as I stumble along.  This is a conversation that will be continued.

And so the dreaded fifth grade is one of my main lenten focuses this year  - the almsgiving, the fasting, and the prayer.

Beyond that, I just want to be open to the possibilities the Good Lord puts in front of me.  I want to pray better.  I want to love better.  I want to be more like Him by the time Lent is over. 

We should pray for one another.

ten things about me that you might not know...link up

Linking this up with my friend Allison (albeit a bit late...) on Rambling Follower.  Join me, if you wish.

By the time I get to the end, it might be "10 things you don't really care if you ever knew"...but anyways....

1.   I am of German, Hungarian, and Irish ancestry (in that order, I think), but I am married to a Cajun.

2.  I have been teaching for 25 years, and all but a year and a half of that has been with Middle School Special Education.  My first semester was with K-3 special ed, and I spent one very long year teaching a regular class of 29 fourth graders.

3.   I was born in Wichita Falls, TX, but have lived all but the first year of my life in Louisiana.  Most of my cousins, aunts/uncles, etc, still live in Texas, and as kids we visited often.  My siblings and I have all thanked my parents for moving.  Apologies to any readers who live in north Texas Tornado Alley.

4.  I was in a tornado once.  I was in second grade, and my brother was in Kindergarten.  I was in the church at school, and I remember a section of roof flying off.  And there was glass everywhere, and the new carpet was ruined.  And the priest was walking around inside the church with his umbrella open afterwards.  I was scared of bad weather for a long time after.

5.  I am far more likely to write about something than to talk about something.

6.  I am an introvert.  My husband is an extrovert.  Endless talking about useless stuff makes me crazy.

7.  There are a lot of things I do not share with my husband.  I wish he listened better.  Conversation shouldn't be a competition.  I have a best friend that I can share anything with.  She listens and she "gets" what I am saying.  I wish she didn't live 1200 miles away.

8.  Death does not scare me.  Suffering does.  But I try not to live life in fear.  Fear is a lack of trust in God.  Suffering is a tool that God uses to make us more like Him and bring us closer to Him.  If we allow it.

9. I have 2 brothers and a sister.  I am the oldest.  There are 17 months between me and my first brother.  Six years between him and my second brother.  And six more years between him and my sister.  My husband has an older brother and a younger sister...all within a 3 year age span.

10.  I am closely watching the weather.  While I was writing this post, I gathered my offspring (woke one up) and headed into the laundry room.  I could hear the wind howling, and then I saw hail.  Along with tornado warnings, etc.

Bonus.  I could probably keep going, but I will spare you!

If you are so inspired, you can create a similar post and put the link in your comments.

happy new year!

What a "holiday"!  Never have I been so glad to return to work after one!  But here I am...still here...still kickin'!

Do I start at the beginning and go to the end?   Or start with the present and work backwards?

The "grandkids" were here for 10 days.  I have grandkids in quotes, because they are dear hubby's, not mine.  I don't mean to be ugly about it, but I am the mother of 2 teenagers.  I am the "uncle mama" (as the oldest grandchild accurately called me when he was much younger).  I don't feel very grandmotherly and I guess that's one thing you can't really rush.  I love my stepson, but it is not the same love that I have for my own two boys. 

Here they are...at the birthday party x 3 that was at my house. #1 is in the black shirt, #2 in the box, #3 in pink.  #4 has her back to us,  for #5  you can only see the head at the bottom of the pic, and #6 is my stepson's "mini-me"...blonde hair and all.  Here's another picture from the party...the anatomically (ahem) correct unicorn...

There were good moments, to be sure.  But it was just too much.  The parents didn't stay at my house, so when I hosted children, I couldn't be the indulgent grandmother, but rather had to work too hard at keeping law and order, feeding the picky, and keeping up with dishes and clothes.  The worst (can I complain?  yep, it's my blog, I surely can!) was New Year's Eve.  I had 4 of the six, plus my own two boys.  My husband was working.  I hadn't really asked for all 4...they just kind of ended up in my car with their backpacks.  Who was I going to send back?  Meanwhile the parents and grandmother rang in the New Year's with only 2 children.  Yeah, you might be sensing a tiny bit of resentment there.

The 5 year old slept with my younger teen, who had the pleasure of staying with him until he went to sleep/passed out.  "Mom, I don't think I want to be a teen dad," he told me after that night.  Better than all the courses on abstinence he could ever take!  Really, I wouldn't have made it without my boys!  They went outside later in the evening to pop some fireworks.  "Be especially careful not to blow off any body parts that will need reattaching," I warned them, 'because I am NOT taking six children to the emergency room!"  I was serious.

I had made it crystal clear that anyone who slept over at my house on Saturday would be going to church on Sunday, and should bring clothes appropriate for the occasion.  Still, one showed up with only the clothes she had on, and another said nothing fit, another couldn't find socks.  Nonetheless, we made it to Mass and everyone had the vital necessities covered.  The behavior was pretty good.  The five year old was probably the best.   The 12 year old made his First Communion that day.  (oops)  He has been with us to Mass before, and has always gone up for a blessing when we receive Holy Communion, but Sunday, he was seated behind us with his uncles (we have short pews that don't hold 8 people) and received.  There was nothing to do at that point. 

Anyway, as I said, there were good moments (hearing "I pooped in my underwear was NOT one of them) but 10 days was too long for me.  Call me selfish.  I went along with the program.  I did what I needed to do.  I don't think I caused any long-lasting harm to any of the children.  Chances are, I'll be in this situation again, and should probably be better prepared.  But by Sunday afternoon, I was done!  Finding the change container in my car MIA later that evening, when I needed 4¢ more to complete my transaction at the Dollar General did nothing to improve things. 

After the holidays I had had - the Christmas morning fiasco and the many moments of being a mom of many, I knew confession was a stop that needed to be on my itinerary sooner, rather than later.  On Wednesday, I dropped my kids off at the bus, and then made my way to the church near my school.  There is no Mass there on Wednesday mornings, so I spent about an hour there...just conversing with the Lord, reading a little bit, speaking with him in the tabernacle, and praying at the statue of the Holy Family, kneeling at the manger, where even there He reaches up to touch us.  I think I probably made myself more nervous than I needed to be about confession, but when I left the church that morning at about 7:30, the sun was up, and the sky was absolutely radiant.  I wish I would have had my camera, but pictures wouldn't have done it justice.  I knew then that things would be OK. 

I drove down the road to my church.  Mass is at 8, and that is too late for me with work, but confessions are at 7:45, which is perfect!  Bless me Father...it's just been a couple of weeks...but they sure were some long ones!  He's OK with a little humor, sometimes.  I said what I had to say, owned the things I needed to own, but then I had a question.  I don't generally bring up what other people say and do in confession, because it's about me, not them, but this I needed an answer to.  I hesitated, because I wasn't sure if he would give me an answer or not, but I went ahead and asked.  I have said it before, and I will say it again....my confessor is awesome!  He was so kind, so encouraging and affirming.  He laid it all on the table, spelled it out.  He knew exactly what I was asking, and knew exactly what to say in response.  I felt so much better leaving than I did coming in!  I have no idea how long we spoke - 5, 10 minutes, but it made the whole day better!

And so here we are....the Christmas season is almost over.  We have rung in 2012.  (Is anyone planning to wait until after the supposed end of time to Christmas shop this year?).  The church will soon switch over to Ordinary time for a few weeks before Lent...and life rolls on. 

Our task and my penance from yesterday to reflect on...To do the will of God, to do it in the manner in which He wills it, and to do it because it is His will.  (From St. Elizabeth Seton - who's feast was yesterday)