post-election musings part 1: God's will

I think there is a wide-spread tendency to chalk up everything  -  especially unpleasant things -  that happens as part of "God's Plan" or "God's Will".  This has become especially clear to me in the wake of the presidential election, the results of which, were quite disappointing to me and mine. 

There is an "oh, that must be God's will" mentality that follows.  I submit that it is most assuredly NOT God's will for us to have a leader who promotes abortion, who is hell-bent on pushing contraception to the point of  requiring even those whose consciences dictate otherwise to pay for it, who advocates and approves of  gay marriage, etc.  We have the God-given gift of free will, and on November 6, 2012, more Americans than not, used their free will to vote in support of these things.  This was even more disappointing to me than the choice for President.  Ultimately God's Will is not determined by popular or electoral vote, but rather by the teachings of Jesus and His Church.  (And in the interest of being bi-partisan, I don't propose that Mr. Romney was God's Will, either.  Closer in many areas, but far from a perfect candidate.)

That we humans would screw it up should come as no huge shocker.  Man has been deviating from the will of God since the apple incident back near the beginnings of mankind.  His Chosen People, the Israelites, didn't get it right, either.  They were left to wander in the desert for 40 years as a result of their hard- heartedness, and then they still didn't get it right after that.  Hundreds of years later, they were sent into exile and some of the tribes were never to return.

My Facebook status that night, cognizant of the fact that I have friends and co-workers who cancelled my vote, borrowed from Deuteronomy. 

    ...oh that you would choose life.  Maybe next time, Lord.  Have mercy.

those little things

Things that are probably not particularly meaningful to others besides me, but that I don't want to forget.

A week or so ago, we showed up at Catechism (CCD) only to have our priest drive up right beside us.  "Oh, no," one of my offspring groaned.  "Confessions?  Tonight?  I haven't even had time to make a list."  Usually towards the end of the fall catechism run, our priest comes to hear confessions from the kids enrolled, but there were still a few weeks left to go.  Due to a scheduling conflict,. I think this was a last minute alteration to the schedule.

As we were driving home that evening, my child remarked that the 20 minutes or so standing in line waiting really hadn't been enough time to think about what he wanted to say.  He must have conveyed this to the priest, though, because the priest told him not to worry - just to leave every thing else up to God.  He seemed to be at peace with that.  I noticed the peace.  As we continued on, he volunteered that he had just mentioned the two things that had been bothering him the most.

I have no clue as to what these might be, but I asked if he had gotten any advice.  He said about our priest's counsel, "He knew just the right thing to say."  I find this to be true about our pastor in my experience, as well.  He DOES know just what to say.  Surely as much as the Holy Spirit working through him as his own wisdom and experience.  I just think it is cool that one of my teenagers can see that, too.

Those are pictures taken of a sunrise one morning from school.  I think I am there too early, if I can see the sun rise.  To be fair, these were before we set the clocks back.

Above is a picture of my older son measuring things for his Eagle Scout Project.  Just documenting that small minute in time.

A couple of pictures from Tuesday's District Cross Country meet.  Neither did particularly well, but the weather was gorgeous, and it was a distraction for the afternoon.

Nothing earth-shattering.  Just some little things.

memories of henry, hope for sandy

Last weekend, as "super storm" Sandy took aim at the northeastern part of our country, my boys ran in a cross country meet in the little known town (village?) of Henry, Louisiana.  I was eager for this meet, because it was the first time in several years that I had occasion to visit Henry, and I was anxious to see the progress that had been made.

As you can see, Henry is a little town not too very far from the Gulf Coast.  My first dealings with Henry were when I interviewed for a job there a little over 20 years ago.  At the time, I think they had a K-12 school, but it has since closed due to consolidation, and at this point, all that appears to remain is a gym.  I chose to wait for a job a little closer to home, and that was that.

Until about 4 years ago.  Hurricane Ike had rolled through, and my sons' Boy Scout troop had offered their services in helping with clean up.  We stopped first in Erath, where we wiped down walls and picked items strewn about in the cemetery, and then journeyed on to Henry.  The destruction there was just heartbreaking.  We concentrated our efforts on the Catholic Church.  A few weeks earlier, it had looked like this.

The church was already about 3 feet off of the ground, and the water left by the storm surge reaches to the door handles.

There we met Fr. Matthew, a priest from India.  The church had suffered a similar fate after Hurricane Rita, 3 years earlier, and they had just completed renovations.  He had moved back in to the rectory only a few months before Ike.  He was so proud of the new furnishings - real wood pews in the church, new furnishings in the rectory.  It was so sad to see the pews and the buckled wood floor in the sanctuary.  We wiped the film from the pews, and it came back as soon as we wiped it way...probably mold, rather than mud.  The rectory was being gutted that day.  Loads and loads of moldy, wet sheet rock carted out.  We did what we could (which wasn't much), but we left touched that day.  Sometimes when you attempt to give, you are the one who receives, and it was true that day.

Fr. Matthew has since returned to his native country, but he touched us all.  So appreciative, but seemingly in shock, as he carried a few more items that had been on the second floor to his car.

But Henry is a place that you don't happen upon, unless it is your destination, as it was for us this past Saturday.  The school was gone - demolished after Ike, except for the gym (which still smells faintly of mildew).  In the gym hang banners from championships and teams past.  Rather sad, as if time stopped in 1991 or so.

But what we most wanted to see was the church.....

It has been raised another six feet or so.  Unfortunately, it was locked (as most churches are today) and we could not see the inside.  The rectory is gone, moved to a house a few doors down.

And so there is hope. Things do get rebuilt.  Life does go on.  And in the chaos and in the sadness in the good that we do for others, God does work and touch hearts and lives.

yes, i can

I was twice touched today.

Dropped by the confessional this afternoon.  My good priest was sitting there reading a book in the dim light.  I had nothing earth-shattering this time, it was just "time".  Kind of like you get your oil changed before it stops working.  My kinda-sorta rule of thumb is once a month or so and/or before I serve as a Eucharistic Minister.

Sometimes I know that I am a prayer-slacker.  Especially during weeks like this when everything is out of sync.  So we discussed prayer in depth.  Or rather, he gave counsel on prayer and I mostly listened.  Quality over quantity, he says.  Even if it's just five minutes that you give to the Lord.  It's more about listening, than talking....it's about the relationship.

So, prayer is not just something whereupon you think back at the end of a day, "Well, my life today was a prayer...."  No, giving love, sharing love, which is what prayer is, requires a conscious choice. Some days, the prayer may be offering everything to God, but it is a conscious thing.

I struggle with a routine, with making prayer a conscious choice, a conscious part of my day.  Mass is a given of most days, and on most school days, a stop at the church across the street for a few minutes of quiet in front of the Blessed Sacrament is easily done.  But beyond that...it's a wasteland.  I know I could put down my iPad and say the Rosary.  Especially in light of current events in this country or even in my family.  But another game of Bingo Bash holds so much promise. Or just checking that Facebook status one more time.  Good in their own right, but a pain in the larger picture.

And, as he pointed out...I am not him.  I am not Teresa of Avila.  I am Karen of ThisPlace.  My prayer, his prayer, her prayer....all differ in structure and routine.  If only I knew what my routine needed to be...

And for your penance...he has a twinkle in his eye...."when you hear the Gospel today, and you hear Jesus ask if you can drink from the cup, you say, 'Yes, I can.  And I will.'  But you will have to wait to find out what is in the cup."

The Cup that we must drink...the same one that Jesus drank....self-emptying love.  And what does that mean?  When we forgive and empty ourselves of anger and hurt;  when we say 'no' to temptation or sin; when we come together to offer fitting worship - not just going through the motions, and empty ourselves of distractions; when we do an act of kindness for another, especially when they don't deserve it.  All drinking from the cup.  The questions is....are we thirsty?

So a two-sacrament day.  Jesus reaching out and touching me.  How awesome is that?

blessed fall break

First of all...I think the lack of laptop is causing the fall off in my blogging.  I've had stuff all week to post, but the best vehicle is my laptop.  If I hook it up to the monitor in the computer room when no one is occupying the desktop computer, I am almost c.o.n.s.t.a.n.t.l.y interrupted by my loving family.

For the first time ever, my school system had an entire week off for Fall Break!!  And to say that we surely needed it after the circus that the first nine weeks has been, is an understatement.

My family and I took advantage of the pleasant fall weather and rented a cabin at a State Park not far from our home. 

  This was the view from our cabin, which featured a screen porch overlooking the water.

We rented a canoe one day, and one of my children humored me and we paddled around on the Inner Canoe Trail.

We saw small alligators, bunches of turtles and random birds.

In  the evening, the grill masters bar-b-q'd.

A crane flew over to check it out...

We finished off the evening with s'mores and child #2 rearranging the furniture to have a good view of the television for the Presidential debate.

Dear hubby, bless his heart, had never made s'mores before, but had seen a recipe on TV.  He had bought semi-sweet chocolate earlier in the day, which he melted in a pan and spread on the marshmallow-graham cracker combos.

It was tres bien!

We spent two nights in the swamp and then made our way home where we had time to catch up on things that seem to get left in the dust during school...Eagle Project, blogging, haircuts, attending school board meetings,  Boy Scout things.  It has been a lovely week.  Trust me when I say that the time has flown!

Happy Fall Break!

lettered

Just documenting some family history....

The much awaited letter jacket, arrived a few weeks ago, and my dear child has been anxiously awaiting a chance to wear it.  Some mornings we are in the 50's, but still hitting the 80's most days.

Growing up way too fast. 

undoer of knots

A while back, a friend told me about a Mass that she had attended where there had been reference to "Mary, Undoer of Knots" in the homily.  We both quite aware of many of the titles that our Blessed Mother claims....Our Lady of Guadalupe/Kibeho/Fatima/Lourdes, Mary Queen of the Universe, Mother of Perputal Help, Mary Mother of God, and many, many more.  But Mary, Untier (or Undoer) of Knots was a new one for both of us.

About a month or so ago, I got an email from a friend, who asked for prayers for her stomach issues.  Knots.  My mind went back to this particular Marian title, and I did a quick google search for it, so I could send her more info.  I came across this wonderful website.  And there was this image of Our Lady, undoing the knots in our lives which hold us bound. 

As I read the description, I was pretty sure that this novena fit my life every bit as much as it did hers - maybe more. 

But what are these knots?


There are the problems and struggles we face for which we do not see any solution … knots of discord in your family, lack of understanding between parents and children, disrespect, violence, the knots of deep hurts between husband and wife, the absence of peace and joy at home. There are also the knots of anguish and despair of separated couples, the dissolution of the family, the knots of a drug addict son or daughter, sick or separated from home or God, knots of alcoholism, the practice of abortion, depression, unemployment, fear, solitude…Ah, the knots of our life! How they suffocate the soul, beat us down and betray the heart’s joy and separate us from God. (from theholyrosary.org) 

Not one for novenas, and not a totally committed Rosary pray-er, I felt drawn to this one.  And besides, October is the month of the Rosary, I reasoned.


Each evening for 9 days, I made time to say and mediate on the mysteries of the Rosary and added in the designated Novena prayers at the end of the 3rd and 5th mysteries.  I don't know if you are supposed to have a different knot for our Blessed Mother each night, but mine was pretty much the same one every night.  I couldn't tell much difference from day to day.  On the ninth day, the prayer was one of Thanksgiving, thanking the Blessed Mother for untying whatever knot, and I couldn't help but think, "but I don't think anything has happened yet....I'm not even finished with this rosary."

Oh, me of little faith.  It HAS been better.  Can't explain it.  Can't say how long it might last.  But, as has often happened, grace entered my life when I least expected it, and at least for a little while...that knot is no longer holding me bound.

Your mileage may vary.

Mary, Undoer of Knots, pray for us.

(PS - I know how long it has been since I blogged.  Insert random excuse - broken laptop, busy crazy life, lack of subject matter.  Take your pick!)